Blogging the Oscars 2

Second post. Lauren Bacall is stumbling badly through an introduction. I've never liked her, but this isn't her fault. She's doing her best with what must be a difficult to read teleprompter.

It's a salute to "noir." Seems to me the "noir" concept is getting out of hand. What was originally used as a concept intended to make a certain group of films more intelligible based on shared stylistic and thematic traits has turned into some kind of aspiration or empty meaningless praise.

These "best actress" ads are pretty good, but I remember host Salma Hayek did the same thing on SNL the night before the Oscars when she was nominated for Frida. I know I just admitted to watching SNL, but look more closely... "host Salma Hayek..." Make sense now?

As I recall, Salma accused Renee Zellweger of being a man, calling attention to her "cajones."

9:19, Charlize Theron on docs

Saw two of these. March of the Penguins is going to win. Has won. I wanna see a documentary called "March of the French Documentary Filmmakers", but only if they die in scores. I can hear Morgan Freeman saying "...others are not so lucky..." now as a bunch of French filmmakers fall on their backs, arms and legs sticking up. Also saw Enron and not surprised it didn't win. Is someone going to make a doc about the Lay/Skilling prosecutions? I'd like to see that

Haven't seen Crash. Think I will, if only to satisfy the friends who think I should. Its best song nominee is being sung now. Is the movie as precious as this song? God, I hope not.

I've gotta see "Street Fight." Actually, there are a bunch of docs on my Netflix list that I should move up.

9:30, Jon Stewart's not dying, actually. At least, not more than everybody else who hosts this show

Speed reunion (Keanu and Sandra) presenting the art direction award. Good Night and Good Luck is one of the BP nominees. I actually bought tickets to see this movie a few weekends ago, but the screening was cancelled due to break in the film. Of course, my wife and I sat in the theater for 20 minutes waiting for it to start before we figured out something was wrong.

Memoirs of a Geisha is set for a "purty movie" sweep.

Samuel L. Jackson is on, looking sharp. Introducing another self-congratulatory clip collection about how "confrontational" Hollywood is. A lot of these clips are absurd as examples of the bravery of American movies speaking truth to power. Thelma and Louise? 9 to 5? Even "All the President's Men." Is it really bravery to make a movie attacking a president who just resigned in disgrace facing impeachment articles in the House? Make a sequel right now and maybe I'll be impressed.

Stewart's line coming out of it is great: "...and none of those problems ever bothered us again."

Is somebody producing another remake of Inherit the Wind? That I'd like to see.

9:42, Salma Hayek, nice dress

Wow, if I write something about some other hot actress I'd like to see, whill she suddenly appear? Seemed to work that time. Man, she looks great. Am I spelling stuff correctly? I Can't tell.

There was a TV film of Inherit the Wind in 1999 with George C. Scott and Jack Lemmon, which I didn't see. It's not on video, damnit. Why the hell not?

Score from Brokeback Mountain won. Guy got hugged by Salma, bastard. Does this augur a Brokeback juggernaut? Could be. I can easily see Academy voters breaking their backs from patting themselves so hard after handing a bunch of awards to Brokeback Mountain.

In all fairness, making that movie was really brave. Now, if only millions of Americans would show as much bravery by acknowledging that they are gay and live openly gay lives in public.

In truth, Ang Lee showed a lot more bravery making the Hulk. Directing a movie about gay cowboys won't end anybody's career in Hollywood, but throwing away hundreds of millions of dollars of studio money will.